DISCLAIMER

Dr Don is NOT a medical professional, nor is he a psychiatrist or qualified psychologist.

Dr Don holds a Doctorate of Philosophy and is entitled to the use of the prefix Dr. He has however many years of life experience, education, employment history and relationships and this is what his advice is based upon.

ANY advice given here that you wish to consider or follow IS AT YOUR OWN RISK.

Dr. Don is NOT responsible for any consequences for any advice given here that is followed by you as the reader. The advice is only meant as an opinion and observation.

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What is the point of this blog?

The purpose of this blog is to provide some simple opinions and pseudo advice into anything that you the reader may want on any situation, questions or observations.

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I hope to read from you all soon.
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Sunday, August 9, 2009

Oh Noes, What Did I Do?

Miss Y asks:

What does it mean if someone says "I want to know more about you" and asks to go have dinner?
Further questioning and discussion of the situation shows that a Mr X has said such a statement to Miss Y and requested a dinner with them. Unwittingly, Miss Y accepted the invitation.

For me, if someone says that, the interpretation to be had is that Mr X is romantically interested in Miss Y. Wanting to know more about someone is usually the start of a campaign where the interested person launches their plan of action. This usually involves spending copious amounts of time with someone in as many various situations as possible, learning as much information about the person as possible such as their likes, dislikes, habits, hobbies and so forth. Once this crucial information is obtained, attempting to make the other person learn about you is the next step, to generate interest from within them about you.

The problem is, Miss Y isn't interested in Mr X, at all, even though Mr X seems to be a nice enough guy. She however doesn't want to hurt him (she's very anti-hurt/conflict, to the point of being actually very weak when it comes to situations of this type) and so the discussion lead onto how to "undo" the situation.

I said, you could always call and say, sorry, can't do dinner. Direct approach. Other alternatives include stating and asking "Did you just ask me out on a date? I didn't realise but I'm sorry, I'm not interested in a date.." Also direct approach, but more implying that you had no idea to his intentions originally and are seeking a way out.

She didn't particularly like that either, so I told her of another easier alternative, which is, go to dinner with him but during it, talk about some other guy, a lot. This hopefully will give the impression that she is interested in said other person, so that Mr X will pick up on that and not pursue his interests upon her further. She liked this idea, and further more, she has a Mr Z who she does, or at least did, like previously, so she has plenty to rave with if she needs to.

The dinner is next week, but I don't know if she'll make any mention of the outcomes to me.

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